Bus Line’s One-Liners to Stop

Bus Line’s One-Liners to Stop

A multi-national company held a reception to celebrate Christmas. The waiter gave each guest a glass of champagne, but on inspection, each guest noticed that their glass contained a fly. The Swede asked for new champagne in the same glass. The Englishman demanded to have new champagne in a new glass. The Finn picked out the fly out and drank the champagne. The Russian drank the champagne, fly and all. The Chinese ate the fly but left the champagne. The Israeli caught the fly and sold it to the Chinese. The Italian drank two thirds of the champagne and then demanded to have a new glass.

Dating Fails

Some of them also depict Sardarjis as witty or using other people’s stereotyped perceptions against them. Sikhs are a very prosperous and successful people Preetinder Singh explains the origin of the “12 o’clock joke” as follows: His troops passed through Punjab after plundering Delhi and killing hundreds of thousands of Hindus and Muslims, and taking hundreds of women as captive. The Sikhs decided to attack Nadir Shah’s camp and free the captive women.

30 Rock is an NBC Work Com starring Tina Fey (also a writer and executive producer as well as the creator of the series) and Alec show was launched in , and ended in January after seven seasons — not because of the suits, but because the showrunner wanted it to and Baldwin decided he wanted to do something else for a change. note.

One half of the letter tried the friendly approach, offering Santa some cookies and leaving out some carrots for his trusty reindeer. But their fellow letter-writer took a very different tack, informing Santa: However, one invoked Santa’s wife when they told him he needed to lose some weight. One forward-thinking child had spared themselves a later disappointment by asking Santa to bring batteries as well as the present. The kids also used various pieces of evidence to establish why they deserved presents.

One of them told the recipient that ‘I am so good and I never say bad words, not to my parents, or the middle finger. Some children were at pains to reassure Father Christmas that they had been good this year – one informed him they never said bad words or used the middle finger One child took it upon themselves to inform Santa that he needed to lose weight and should ‘stay away from the junk food’ Santa can easily sort out a remote control truck for this child but may have more trouble when he is asked to intervene between two squabbling brothers Another writer did not hold back, telling Santa: You Santa did not give me the toys I wanted for Christmas’ As well as finding all the presents, Santa might find himself caught up in a planning row when he tries to get one child a new McDonalds in their town.

One child’s wishes for world peace may be admirable but perhaps more than the reindeer owner could reasonably be expected to deliver by himself. And Santa will get more than he bargained for in one family when he is asked to ‘make my brother nicer’.

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Report Story It’s evening and I hurry down one of the black and white chequered corridors towards the Matchmaking Service dressing rooms. I can’t believe how quickly the day has gone. I spent the morning archery training with Crystal, and in the afternoon I completed one of the Matchmaking Service Simulations. I glance at the time on my cellphone and my stomach drops.

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Top 10 Christmas Cracker Jokes Christmas cracker jokes are notoriously bad they are cheesy and corny and never very funny but that is part of the fun of reading them. Why did the snowman retire from sport? Snow Competition What do you call a baby Snowman? A Snowball What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck? A Christmas Quacker What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit? Crisp Kringle What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? It’s Christmas Eve Why are turkeys wiser than chickens?

Have you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Turkey? Who gives presents and bites people? Santa Jaws What do you call Santa Claus when he doesn’t move?

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Here are a few of our favourite all-time classics What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? What do they sing at a snowman’s birthday party?

Dec 01,  · For two decades, the modest signs pasted on the back of Santa Monica’s distinctive Big Blue Buses rarely failed to put a grin on motorists unlucky enough to be stuck behind them in traffic. Every month there was a new joke or witty one-liner that served as an offbeat advertisement for the local.

Humor is a matter of taste and a funny question that strikes one person as hysterical might be a dud for someone else, so match questions to your date’s demeanor. If you could be any alien, who would it be and why? This might not be the first question to ask on a date, but it may be good for the second question. This topic covers your date’s views on space travel and clearly outlines the type of gray matter you’re dealing with.

Too detailed, she’s a geek. If she asks what’s an alien, you’re dating under your pay grade. What is your favorite nude beach? This question covers all the basics. Outrage to the question tips you off that the woman is a prude. A quick answer that matches with your favorite nude beach is a match made in heaven.

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As mentioned, eHarmony is more on the serious end — many of its users tend to be marriage-focused. Flirt is very much on casual end of that spectrum. Flirt works on a profile and open messaging system similar to that used by Match. Compared to Match, profiles on Flirt tend to consist of less text and more photos. At the time of writing, Flirt only operated in the United States. For international websites, or for other options similar to Flirt that might work better for you, see our short review of the best casual dating websites.

Picking a funny trivia team name can often make or break a trivia night because, let’s face it, this may be your only chance at a win for the night.

He only takes blood baths. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth. But they are scared anyway. They didn’t know that Rajinikanth can walk through walls. The ones listed are in second place. We all know who won..!! It was even worse for Spiderman. He had to wear his underwear over his head. Today that book is known as “Guiness book of world records” and his childhood homework is now called Wikipedia.

In the afternoon police stopped him.. Because he reached USA without visa..!!!

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You Could Be Next It’s funny how life puts you in the right place at the right time. We have encouraged many of our friends to attend the Lock and Key Events and one of our best friends is still dating a woman he met at the Oxygen Lounge last Fall. It’s a great way to meet singles in a fun, comfortable environment. If you would like us to attend any of your events, we would be happy to share our story.

Santa will turn 90 degrees clockwise if he hits a wall, as will Jesus. You can drag available arrows from the panel under the game area. Once the path is laid out, press the “PLAY” button to set Santa on his you fall down a hole or Jesus gets to your sack first, press the “STOP” button to reset the stage.

When you’re on a date, why not take her to see a movie about dating? It only makes sense to do so. There’s plenty of romantic dating movies to choose from out there, some are funny, some packed with action, some are complete thrill rides, and some are even a little mixture of everything. Here’s ten date movies you can’t go wrong with. A humorous and unconventional date movie set in a weird setting like this is bound to make for an interesting date.

That doesn’t stop him from sneaking out of his house with his grandfather’s car though. The ladies will be swept away by the dreamy Corey Haim, while the guys will drool over the sexy Heather Graham. This is another great date flick if you’re looking to spice things up with a little bit of comedy, mystery, and misadventure. Dating and sex have never been so fun as in movies as it is here, just the right amounts of each for your date.

She can’t date until her older sister does. He’s a cynical and highly intelligent advertising copywriter who takes his year-old nephew out on the town for the night in New York City in search of sex. This film is a clever exploration of the relationship between sex, men, and women, therefore it should provide some thought provoking discussion for you and your date. This classic dating flick depicts Will Smith as a successful NYC dating doctor, who makes it his mission to help men meet the women of their dreams, until he meets his.

There’s the sports aspect for the guys and the love story for the ladies.

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Magooby’s Joke House – Lutherville, MD Mike Britt’s dedication and passion for comedy have landed him appearances on the Late Show with David Letterman, Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn, Def Comedy Jam and his own Comedy Central special.

When do you kick a midget in the balls? When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice Q: What’s the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? Your job still sucks! What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job! How does a woman scare a gynecologist?

By becoming a ventriloquist! Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose? They couldn’t close his casket. What’s 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild? Whats long and hard and has cum in it? How do you kill a circus clown?

SPEED DATING PRANK!!! ft. MIRANDA SINGS


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